How to have intimacy with God

Intimacy with God is available to each of us. It is as accessible as God’s promises. And God’s invitation to intimate fellowship with Him is the greatest test of your faith (James 1:2–4).

The heart of intimacy

Intimacy is the experience of truly knowing and being known by another person. We often use spatial language to describe this experience. When we say «a close friend,» it’s someone we feel very close to; someone who knows us on a deep level. If something happens that damages our closeness with our friend, they feel distant from us. And a person who doesn’t know us intimately knows us on a superficial level.

However, intimacy is not about space, it's about relationships. We all know what it's like to sit next to someone we feel alienated from and feel close to someone who is thousands of miles away.

«Bible knowledge is more valuable than gold when it strengthens our trust in God. Otherwise, it only fuels our pride.».

What makes us close to another person? While there are many components of closeness, and each close relationship has its own unique recipe, the one thing they all have in common is trust. We cannot be close to someone we don't trust.

Trust is what underlies intimacy. The more we trust someone, the closer we allow them to be to us. The degree to which trust is undermined in a relationship is the degree to which intimacy disappears.

A heart that desires intimacy with God

This is as true of our relationship with God as it is of our relationships with others. Our sense of closeness or distance from God is not a reflection of His actual presence with us, but rather an indication of our experience of closeness with Him. Scripture shows that God is close to those who trust Him. The more we trust God, the more we come to know Him. Feelings of distance from God often arise because of a breach of trust, such as through sin or disappointment.

This reality is crucial to understand. As Christians, we long to experience intimacy with God. With the psalmist, we can say: «My happiness is in drawing near to God. In you, O Sovereign Lord, I have put my hope, that I may declare all your works» (Ps. 73:28). We also want to heed James’s encouragement and realize his promise: «Draw close to God, and he will draw close to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.» (Jas. 4:8) However, we may seek this intimacy in ways that do not produce the desired result.

Closeness is more than knowledge

One common mistake is that we think that closeness to God can be achieved by accumulating knowledge. Of course, to know God deeply, we must know important things about Him. Jesus said: «And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free» (John 8:32), and he also pointed out that many worship what they do not know: «You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews» (John 4:22).

But never in the history of the Christian church has so much theological knowledge been available to so many people as it is today. The American church has perhaps the greatest amount of this knowledge. We are flooded with Bible translations, good books, insightful articles, recorded sermons, interviews, films, documentaries, music, and other resources. And much of it is of truly high quality. That is something for which we should be grateful.

But there are not many people in America who walk with God as closely as Enoch, who simply disappeared (Gen. 5:24; Heb. 11:5). Why is that? Because knowledge is not synonymous with trust. That is why Jesus said to the religious leaders of His day, some of whom had an encyclopedic knowledge of the Scriptures, «Search the Scriptures, for in them you think you have eternal life; and they are they which testify of Me; and ye will not come to Me, that ye might have life» (John 5:39–40).

Bible knowledge is far more valuable than gold when it fuels our trust in God, which is the source of our intimacy with Him. (Ps. 19:10) But when Bible knowledge replaces our trust in God, it only fuels our pride. (1 Cor. 8:1).

Why aesthetic experience fails

Another common mistake is trying to achieve intimacy with God through subjective aesthetic experiences. This can be called the «Field of Dreams» approach: if we create the right environment, God will «come.».

Some seek it in settings of high liturgy, which are designed to inspire experiences of transcendence and mystery. Others seek it in modern worship services, which are designed to evoke an experience of God’s presence. Still others pursue revival, believing that proximity to God’s power will lead to proximity to God. If we truly trust God, such settings can foster our closeness to Him. But none of these environments has the power to compel God to come closer to us.

«"God is impressed by our faith, not our achievements.".

Imagine this: A candlelit dinner with romantic music can foster a tender moment of intimacy between a husband and wife, but only to the extent that the setting supports and deepens their mutual trust and love. If there is a distance between them due to a lack of trust, aesthetic conditions alone will not have the power to bridge that distance. Only restoring trust can do that.

How we draw closer to God

The secret of drawing near to God and having Him draw near to us is clearly revealed in the Bible: we draw near to God through faith in Christ, who alone gives us access to Him (Heb. 4:14–16; 7:25; Phil. 3:9), and we place our trust in all the «precious and great promises» (2 Pet. 1:4), which in Christ find their «yes» for us. «For as many as the promises of God are, in him they are «yes»! And in him they are «Amen,» to the glory of God through us!» (2 Cor. 1:20).

God is impressed by our faith, not our achievements. When faith is lacking, He is not pleased with the quantity of our knowledge or the quality of our aesthetic achievements.

«Without faith it is impossible to please God. Those who come to God must believe that he is and that he rewards those who diligently seek him.» (Heb. 11:6).

When God sees someone whose heart fully trusts His promises and lives by them, God comes to firmly support that saint (2 Chron. 16:9) and reveals Himself to him:

«He who has My commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves Me. And he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and manifest Myself to him» (John 14:21).

God's invitation to intimacy

«"The thing you should trust God most about right now is that He intends for you to draw closer to Him.".

God desires intimacy with you. Christ did all the hard work on the cross to make it possible. All He asks is that you believe in Him (John 14:1). He wants you to trust Him with all your heart (Prov. 3:5).

This means that His invitation to you to enjoy intimacy with Him is a visitation in your life that tests your faith more than anything else. The thing you should trust God most about right now is that He intends for you to draw close to Him.

This is certainly an invitation that your sinful nature wants to reject. But as you read the Bible, don’t this great cloud of witnesses (Heb. 12:1) agree with James and Peter that the greatest test of faith is the path to the greatest joy (Jas. 1:2–4; 1 Pet. 1:8–9)? And don’t they agree with Paul that it is nothing compared to the joy of knowing Christ and the glory to come (Phil. 3:8; Rom. 8:18)?

Intimacy with God often occurs in the places where we need to trust Him the most. Heaven on earth is the unspeakable joy and peace that surpasses all understanding that come from complete trust in God. «Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus» (Phil. 4:6–7).

After all, as the old hymn writer said, «Those who trust Him completely find Him completely true.».